What No One Tells You About Grief, Part Two

When I wrote my last post, I realized that I neglected to mention a few of the positive aspects of grief.

You may be asking, “Is there anything positive about grief? About the grieving process?”

I believe so.

Grief can empower you. 

When faced with a difficult situation, humans have an instinctual reaction that is known as “fight or flight.”

Now, there is absolutely no shame in “flight.” There is no shame in taking time to help yourself physically, mentally or emotionally. It doesn’t make you weak to address your emotions. There is no shame in taking time to grieve and to mourn your loss.

What you may not realize is that your grief has the ability to empower you. While grief can drag you down, it can also raise you up. It can remind you of your morals and values. It can show you who and what are important in your life.  Grief can help you to “fight.” Grief can show you the path to heal and recover.

And I’m not going to sugarcoat it, it will be hard. It will not be painless. It will not be easy. You may fail to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But I promise you, it is there. And if you’re having trouble seeing it, have other people light your way.

Grief can spark passion.

This post (and every post I write) is a product of my passion. This particular post is also a product of my sadness, my anger, my myriad of emotions. By expressing myself here, I am allowing myself to grieve. I am allowing myself to understand who I am, and what I want to fight for in this world. These words are allowing me (and hopefully you too) to empathize and connect with others. We may all live different lives, we may have different values, but we all experience grief at some point in our lives.

But passion is something that we can also all experience. How we harness and express our passion is unique to each one of us. Our passions can allow us to get to know ourselves better, and also connect to others who might share our passions.

Grief can allow you to experience things that you typically do not. Grief can expand your ideas, your creativity, your mind’s view. Grief can help you to give back – to yourself and to the world.

Grief can free you. 

It can free you from the banality of everyday life. It can free you from some responsibilities and obligations. It can also show you what you need to get accomplished. It can be the kick in the ass you require to get going. It can spark revolutionary ideas. It can produce change. It can help connect you to your community.

The only thing I ask you to really consider is this. Do not let grief consume you. Do not let be the only thing in your life. Do not let it prohibit you from moving on and fighting for what you believe in.

Grief is unpredictable, unstable in its nature. Grief provokes powerful reactions and emotional fluctuations. However, your grief should not immobilize you. If you choose to wallow in your grief, you may never truly see the bigger picture. If you choose to shy away from what’s uncomfortable, you may not see what exactly it is you have in your life to value.

Grief can empower you, it can spark passion, and it can free you, but only if you let it.

I urge you to let it.

What To Do When It’s A New Month

10) Try to remember what month it is. You may have forgotten. (It’s October)

9) Enjoy the season in which the new month is is. In this case, you get to enjoy the colorful season that is Fall!

8) If there are holidays that will occur during the new month. October = Halloween. (Yes, there are other holidays in October, but most people will connect October with Halloween. Also I just love Halloween)

7) For students (like me), you may have a fall break, and with that the opportunity go home. Enjoy your time, and make sure to bring home any laundry that you need to do. 

6) Break out your seasonal clothes. Also enjoy the change weather that the new month will bring. 

5) Find out about any promotions or deals that are happening this month. Very important if you are a student who lives off of Easy Mac, or you just like deals. 

4) Make sure to double check yourself whenever you write the new date. This is something I fall victim to often, so have a sharp eye. 

3) If you have a monthly calendar, time to change it! If you have a month-by-month planner, switch over to October. You’re welcome.

2) Go outside and celebrate the new month! There’s nothing better than exploring everything that October has to offer. 

1) Enjoy! And don’t forget to change your calendars, and your dates on paper! 

A Watched Pot Never Boils, But What Happens When You Boil Over?

Happy Friday!

My name is Samantha, and I’ve lost my motivation. And I need your help.

Now that I’ve gotten that off of my chest, let me explain.

This hasn’t been a recent thing, it’s been gradually happening for months, even years. It all began when I started writing this blog almost three years ago.

When I started this blog, I did it so I could vent about stuff I was experiencing, to write about things that I was feeling. And I kept doing that for awhile, just writing about my experiences and my feelings. And then, I thought that if I kept writing, I could become on of those famous bloggers, the ones you hear about in the news. Obviously that didn’t pan out, but I kept trying and writing, trying to find my place (any place) in the world.

But then a few months ago, I realized that I wasn’t able to do that anymore. Sure, I was still having experiences, and dealing with feelings, but between two years ago and now, I’ve grown up. And I began to feel like what I was writing about wasn’t worth it, both for you to read, and for me to write about. But then I went on the biggest adventure of my life, and I thought things would suddenly click into place.

As some of you know, for the past four months, I was studying abroad in Florence, Italy. And make no mistake, it was one of the best experiences of my life, and I have so many feelings about the experiences I had. I got to travel to places I’d only dreamed about, Going abroad was something I had dreamed about for years; it was something that I was looking forward to since I entered college. And then it happened, and then, as of last Saturday, it was over. And my dream ended.

So now what?

There’s a phrase “a watched pot never boils”. In the case of being abroad, the pot symbolizes my time abroad, and how I tried to disconnect from “watching” it, and to simply experience it. But now, I’ve returned home, and the pot has boiled over so to speak.

Again, so now what?

Do I simply put another pot of water on the stove? Or do I scrape the burned pot clean? Or do I just give up cooking entirely?

These type of questions have been rattling around in my head for days, and even as I write this, I’m still lost on what to do.

But here’s what I do know.

I know I want to keep writing. I have no idea about what I want to keep writing about, so ideas/topics are appreciated.

I’d like for you all to keep reading. If you’ve skipped most of what I’ve written so far, that’s fine, but even if you read a word of what I’ve wrote, I’m happy.

I want to hear from you. And I want you to hear from me too. This is the most important thing. Without communication, there is no inspiration (and yes, I did just make that up). I am making a promise that with each comment, like, or emoji I receive, you’ll receive one back from me. And if I don’t hold up my end of the bargain, call me out on it. I dare you to.

And with those three things, I eagerly await your feedback. And maybe I’ll start off this new change with the purchase of a new pot, yet to be touched by water.

xxoo

I Am Not A Poet (Or, Why I Don’t Claim To Be)

Happy Monday.

I cannot call myself a poet. Yes, I love poetry, and I love reading/writing it, but I refuse to call myself a poet.

Why?

Because I feel that the second you give yourself a name or a label, you are branded with it. You are now known as a poet, and that means people expect poems from you.

It’s the same thing with any career. Are you in business? Then you, my friend, are a businessman. Are you involved with teaching? Then you must be a teacher.

There are so many different ways we can describe what we love and what we want to do other than our labels. The world is not simply black and white, nor are we, so our labels shouldn’t have to be also.

Have a great Monday!
xxoo

Chapters 465, 466, 467, 468, 469, 470 & 471: Coming and Going

Happy Friday!

I hate to say it, but I’m sad today. I found out that two of my close friends at college will not be there this semester (one is taking a leave, the other is transferring), and another friend is transferring at the end of the semester. It sucks to know that they’re leaving, even though I know it’s best for them. 

It’s just frustrating to see people you care about leave. It makes me feel like I did something wrong, even though I know I didn’t. Maybe there will be new people to hang out with and become friends with!

People leaving sucks, but hopefully there will be people coming into my life too!

How do you feel when people leave?

Have an awesome day!

xxoo

Chapters 370 & 371: October

Happy Tuesday!

And a very happy October to all of you! Only 30 more days until Halloween, which happens to be one my favorite holidays of the year!

October is an interesting month. It’s the beginning of fall, and it seems like everything begins to fall into place. The leaves change, the weather gets cooler, and people dress warmer. October is the beginning of the winter months, and we hold onto it dearly before the weather truly chills. Fall represents so much more than the seasons changing, it represents how we change as the season come and go, and what we choose to do while we are in them.

And you thought I’d be discussing the government shutdown, didn’t you? Well, I was planning to, but I figured this would be a lighter topic to discuss for today.

So, what is your favorite season, and why? 

Have an amazing week! xxoo

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Chapter 317 & 318: Television

Happy Wednesday!

Television. It is a huge part of our lives, and lately, it seems to be heading towards the path of social media sites. Sites such as Netflix and Hulu stream shows (some for free), making it possible for viewers to access content on a device other than their television screens.

Is that a good thing? It means that technology is advancing, that new breakthroughs and ideas are coming to light each and every day in this fast-paced world of ours. 

But could it be a bad thing? The television industry is suffering from the use of other technology to view shows, with ratings and viewership suffering from the lack of viewers tuning in to live shows/new episodes.

Technology is an amazing thing, but it is also terrifying. And it’ll keep changing, evolving into something bigger and better. And I guess we’re just going along for the ride.

So, what do you think about the advancement of technology?

Have an awesome week! xxoo

P.S. I’ve decided to try something new out, a Quote Of The Day (QOTD)! Let me know what you think of this idea 🙂

Today’s QOTD: “The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.” -B. F. Skinner 

Chapters 151, 152, 153 & 154: Unexpected Extension

Happy Wednesday!

For the past few days, I’ve been away on vacation, staying with my family. It’s been pretty nice and relaxing, minus the slight sunburn I’ve managed to get. However, this morning, my plans took a slight turn.

Originally, I was supposed to return back home tomorrow morning, but due to awful weather, I’ll be going home Saturday morning instead. While I’m happy I get two more days in the sun, I’m hoping the bad weather clears up by then, because I’m supposed to go back to school on Sunday.

Oh well, for now, I’ll just enjoy the warm weather while it’s still around!

Hope you all have a great week, and stay safe!

xxoo

Chapter 52: Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you that celebrate it! 

For my family, this Thanksgiving, we did things a little differently. Instead of all waking up to watch the Macy’s Day Parade, we each got up at different times and relaxed. Our dinner table was set the same way, same foods, same company, but it felt different. Maybe it was because I knew that in a few days, I’ll be boarding a bus straight back to school for finals. 

Either way, it was a great Thanksgiving, and I’m thankful for a lot of things, but especially my family, because they keep me sane and grounded even while I’m away.

xxoo